Core and Flex

Building Cultural Intelligence through Self-Awareness

Nov 06, 2024

I was recently viewing Julia Middleton’s TedTalk entitled “Cultural Intelligence: The Competitive Edge for Leaders.” It’s not a new talk, but it strikes me as being particularly relevant today.

I especially like Middleton’s framework of Core and Flex, which offers a powerful tool for developing Cultural Intelligence (CQ®), and for helping us understand when to stand firm and when to adjust.

What Are Core and Flex?

Core represents our deeply held values and beliefs – the aspects of ourselves that feel essential and unshakeable. These are the parts of us that define who we are, regardless of where we are or whom we’re with. Knowing our Core helps us stay grounded and authentic.
Flex is where we find room to adapt, learn, and adjust to new cultural contexts. Flexibility doesn’t mean losing ourselves. Instead, it’s about exploring ways to connect with others without compromising what truly matters.

Understanding the Knots

This is where things get really poignant, and really relevant. In her talk, Middleton describes the Knots we all have – those tricky areas where our Core values meet resistance or where our willingness to Flex is challenged. These Knots can create friction, but they’re also valuable opportunities for reflection and growth. By untangling these Knots, we learn more about ourselves and build the resilience needed to thrive in diverse settings.

But sometimes there are Knots we just can’t untangle, and instead of being able to shift them to our Flex, where they really belong, we end up holding them in our Core. I love what Middleton says we should do in such instances – that’s when we have to remember one important rule: my Knots are my issue, not anybody else’s.

For me, untangling Knots can sometimes be hard, largely due to my upbringing – I grew up in an environment in which “compromise” was a word that generally had negative connotations. That’s not healthy, but it’s something I’ve had to learn to deal with. I have plenty of Knots, and while I’ve tried to move them to my Flex, there are some that remain stubbornly rooted in my Core. I appreciate Middleton’s advice here: it’s OK that I can’t remove them the way I’d like, but I need to remember that they are my problem and not make them someone else’s.

Bringing It All Together with Cultural Intelligence

I believe that understanding our Core and Flex is essential for effective cross-cultural communication. Cultural Intelligence isn’t just about adapting to others – it’s about finding a balance between authenticity and openness. By identifying what’s Core and what’s Flex, we can confidently navigate cultural differences, build inclusive teams, and foster genuine connections across borders.

Reflect and Act:

What are the Core values that define who you are?
Where can you practice more Flex to better connect with others?
Are there Knots you’re ready to untangle? And what are you going to do with those you can’t untangle (at least, not yet)?

[CQ is a registered trademark, used by permission]